Sunday, August 12, 2012

His Majesty the Policeman
by Lord Buckley

    I got to thinking about His Majesty, The Policeman, see.
    I figured that must be the draggiest job in the world.
    And what a drag it is going out on a good day.
    You're feeling really good.
    You're riding along and your squad car is all polished up,
    you know what I mean.
    And you're feeling real mellow.
    Along comes some poor stud with one
    loaded with kids, like flower pots all over the place.
    Going a little too fast, you know what I mean.
    You've got to stop the cat.
    You've got to bring him down and lay one on him.
    It's a pretty tough job
    and when you walk up to him you don't know
    whether they're going to pull out
    a French seventy-five or what-the.
    It's a drag. So, I wrote a little thing called:

    His Majesty, The Policeman,
    He's the children's friend at every bend,
    The Policeman
    And you can bet your life,
    He's hip to Mack the Knife
    That's His Majesty, The Policeman

    You should never trip a policeman
    Or try to hip or even tip a policeman
    Get a ticket to the ball
    And you can't fight city hall
    That's His Majesty, The Policeman

    So remember their nobility
    They're here, they're there, they're everywhere it's mobility
    You can look near and far but they'll pin you by radar
    That's Their Majesty, The Policeman

    Here they come - hewbetty boop
    The Man In Blue - hoobbit bop
    The Sargent's there - ribbetty bip
    The Patrolman too - hahbetta bop
    The Chief looks great - hahbetta bop
    The Captain's straight - ribbetty bip
    Hip Hip Hurray - da da da dah
    The Royal Crew - Habetta bahbetta bah

    You always try to swing with a policeman
    And never ring-a-ding a policeman
    And if you're really hip
    You'll never make a slip
    Against Their Majesties, The Policemen

From The Bad-Rapping of the Marquis de Sade, World Pacific, 1969
Recorded live in Oakland, California, 1960

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